sorry if this gets posted twice !
know that looking back at everything it seems like I played you .. that I never really had feelings for you in the first place but believe me I did. I fell for you hard , yes it was a long time ago but either way , I still fell for you . We met at a friends house , we hit it off . Late night phone calls , hanging out all the time even though we went to different schools. What we had was different, but thats what I liked about it , about us . With you , I could be myself . I wanted nothing more than to be your girl but it didn’t really seem like that was going to happen. I guess we can both say you didn’t have the guts even though you told me you liked me and your friends kept pushing you to ask me . At one point I just got tired of it , of us , of waiting for you when I waited for so long .. Time passed … Days , months, until we started talking again. It was only because one of your bestfriends was dating my bestfriend that I had to see you. Like old times we hit it off again. Cuddling led to kissing and you asked me out right there . I guess you realized you blew it last time and you wanted to make up for it so you wouldn’t lose me again. Ofcourse I couldn’t say yes right there and then. I couldn’t .. things were going way to fast . How could I be your girlfriend in a couple hours when we hadn’t even talked for months the day before ? I ran outta the room and avoided you the rest of the night. I know , I’m sorry .. I really am . The last time we saw each other was at that debut . We danced slowly with your arms around my waist .. Yes you kept turning to fast but it didn’t matter . All I wanted was to be with you but because of what happened the first time I didn’t wanna risk giving my heart again only to have it broken . I know , I hurt your feelings too and I want you to really know that I really am sorry . Seeing you today just brought back memories . It kinda hurt how you didn’t even say hi to me when I was sitting right beside you today . I wasn’t expecting to see you but thats life , surprise surprise . I guess because I hurt you now you want to hurt me . Maybe one day will be our day , all I know is back then I wasn’t ready and when I was you weren’t around to wait. I pushed you away , I’m sorry but now I have a guy that really does make me happy .. once that was you but now its not . All I can say now is I’m sorry , I hope you find a girl that makes you happy as much as you made me happy.
by mich3lly